Caged
by XxTokyoxRift
Summary: Janice lost everything to them, even her happy memories as a child. But they gave her every nightmare and heartache. She's cold and distant from everyone, not willing to risk herself or her last bit of sanity if she were to lose someone else to the Titans. If she was going to lose herself, it was going to be for avenging those who have suffered like her and fighting for Humanity.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: This story I am writing, Caged, it is a story request from a fellow writer. The OC Janice Robin and anything about her is owned by Shiranai Atsune. Now then, let's start...

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Dreams. Some people call them fate, destiny even, while others call them an escape. I wish I could be like those people. Having dreams and calling them fate, destiny or an escape, but me, I don't have that luxury of a nice, safe haven. No, I have the honor of something called nightmares. Images of my past when I was a child, the happy moments when my family was still alive, didn't exist, if they do I barley remember them clearly. Memories replay like moving pictures of how they died though. Those, I know, will forever be burn in my eyes, in my mind and my memory. The nightmares never seem to ease or to get better, I've just somewhat learned to live with it now.

The images of a women wearing beat up shoes, a dingy grey shirt and worn blue pants, screaming and running towards me for her life, desperately trying to out run the hideous, the grotesque creature that had only moments ago stepped on a middle aged man, was my mother.

"MOM RUN!" I desperately yelled for her to run faster.

After just witnessing my father push her in front of him, to save her, only to see him fall to the ground from the Titan's feet, shacking the earth he ran on. Not a few seconds later, I see the Titan raise its foot above my father, and brought it down with such force, that his blood sprayed the ground where he just laid moments go.

My mother was running, as fast as she could, but I knew, and for some sick reason I knew she knew too, that she wasn't fast enough to out run this thing, but just fast enough to prolong her death, even by just the few seconds my father have gave her.

I was leaning against an old building with only my head and left hand visible, peaking out from around the buildings corner watching my mother, and to see her look at me with desperate and pleading eyes, made it unbearable for me to watch as the Titan has finally reached her. It reach down for her with blood on the side of its right cheek and dirt smeared on the left. The fingers Wrapped around her waist and lifted her with no effort at all.

Hearing her screaming and crying her lungs and eyes out made it hard for me to breath and to move. I had to run I know this, but I also couldn't leave her alone. I know she doesn't want me to be here and to be running away while it's distracted with her, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't force myself to leave her. I had to see her, even if it was to see her die, she wasn't going to be alone in her last seconds.

The beast opened its mouth and saliva was dripping from the teeth, it lowered its hand and opened its fingers, and just like that, she was gone. A finale scream of desperation was cut off as the Titan closed its mouth and looked around for it's next kill. I quickly moved my head back behind the building, panting heavily after what I just witnessed and started running to the boats, tears were streaming down my face at what had just happened. My hands were clinched as I ran, and they were so tight that my finger nails were cutting into my palm.

How I got to the boats, I have no idea, all I remember was trying not to fall and breath, it was all a blur. I walked to the front of the boat and collapsed down, my legs couldn't take me any further. The burning sensation of my muscles in my legs told me that I had pushed my body too much to ask for anything more from it. This feeling, the burning I felt, not just in my legs but all over my body told me only one thing. I have to survive, I have to. I have to survive for mother, for father and for everyone else that were just like me. Who lost everything to those monsters. I'll survive.

I flew up out of bed as a scream barley left my mouth before I shut my lips to lull the sound in my cheeks. My breathing was labored and I tried to take deep breaths to calm myself. After my breathing was steady to how I liked it, I glanced around the room to see If I woke anyone up, normally I do, but for some reason, here lately, no one has been waking up.

I wander if they were getting use to it, or if they were wearing ear plugs, either way a part of me was glad no one woke up. I felt bad depriving the other trainees of their sleep, no matter how minuscule it was. I took another deep breath and slowly blew it out my nose and laid back down and covered myself up again. It was still dark outside which meant I had at least another three hours to sleep before training started again.

"Hey, do you see her?", I heard some boy say as I was making my way to my training ground.

"Yeah, the girl with the black spikey hair and hazel eyes?", Another boy said.

"Yeah, I heard she is the oldest Cadet here in training", the first boy said.

"What?!, No way! But she looks so small. Well, how old is she then?" The second boy asked.

"Someone told me she's around fifteen"

"Three years older then us, I like em older"

After hearing that conversation I flicked my eyes over to them and saw them turn beat red, then scurry away. 'Boy's, always about hormones' I thought, and shook my head and made it to my training grounds.

I walked up and stood inline in the second row beside a girl named Krista. She was a bit shorter then my 165cm self, and from what I could tell, she was a ball of pure sweetness and kindness.

"Hi, I'm Krista, and you are?", she looked me straight in the eye with her doe eyes and smile.

Sweetness and kindness indeed.

"Um, Janice", was all I said and went back looking up at the front, waiting for the training to begin.

"Janice, pretty name, I like it", she commented.

"Shut up you two! Training is starting.

Running laps was always a good past time for me, It helped to clear my head, but also tire my body so I was able to sleep most of the night before the nightmares take over. The sun was bright, clouds scattered the sky and wind gently blew through the air, creating a nice day for training. After the warm up laps, the trainer yelled it was time for Sparring.

We all ran in our group around base to the sparring field and made a half circle around the instructor.

"Alright listen up, you will be put into pairs, you will spar with them for five minutes, then you will rotate to the left and spar with that person. You will switch partners when I blow a whistle. Is that understood!?" his voice boomed at the last three words.

"Yes sir!" we saluted.

"Even, Jean. Mikes, Krista. Ymir, Janice. Rainer, Armin. Bertolt, Sasha. Get in your pairs and start".

I walked over to the far outer circle and saw the girl named Ymir was just a few feet in front of me.

"Janice right?, well, let's see what you got girl", and Ymir got into a fighting stance.

I walked into the circle and brought my left hand close to my face and my right hand was just in front of my left. My elbows were in close to my ribs and a bent my knees a bit, and just barley got onto the balls of my feet, so if I needed to move quick, I could.

She took three suck steps to me and I side stepped her to the right and brought my left leg up to kick her in the stomach. I made contact but she also crabbed my leg and went to pull me back to her, but I rotated on my right foot and dropped to the ground, kicking up at her with my right leg. She dropped my leg and stumbled back, I used the momentum of my kick to put my hands on the ground and push myself up and spin back into a fighting stance. She turned to look at me after regaining her balance with a surprised look in her eyes.

"Let's try this again", she gestured with her hand for me to make the first move this time, and I happily obliged her.

I took small steps towards her, judging her reaction on my approach to her, and she didn't give anything away. I did a quick one-two step and went to punch her right in the face, but stopped as a whistle blew. I was mere cm from her left cheek and she was looking at my out stretched fist, frozen in mid air.

"Ho-how did you stop in time? I mean that's like not possible", she said as I lowered my hand and took a step back.

"Practice", was all I said and walked to my left to meet my next partner.

I walked maybe ten feet before I saw who my next partner was.

"Hey, I know you, we grew up together right?, Well not together, but same neighborhood right?"

My next partner was Eren, and yeah, he was right. We did grow up in the same neighborhood. I would see him all the time when I was exploring the city. He was constantly and countless times getting into fights our arguments with kids older then him or with adults. He would always wait by the gate every time the Scouts would go out and when they returned. It never failed, even when you could see that their mission was not a success, he would always welcome them back with a smile plastered on his face. A boy filled with naivety, but with such passion, it would make anyone his follower.

"Uh, yeah, Eren right?", I know exactly who he was, but I didn't even think he knows my name.

"Your name starts with a J right? Jaqueline? no you don't look like a Jaqueline. Jacky, maybe?", No wander why he never meets any strangers, he has the personalty to befriend anyone he want's.

"Janice, actually" I told him and stood in front of him.

"Janice...cool, I like it" he gave me a smile and a slight bob of his head.

"So you ready for this? I won't be as easy as Ymir over their"

"Hey! She surprised me that's all!" I looked at Ymir and saw he get tackled by her new partner.

"Robin, Yeager stop talking and fight!" Shadis yelled at us.

"Your last name is Robin, like the bird?" Eren questioned.

"Yeager! Open that mouth of yours one more damn time, and I will have you on kitchen duty!" Shadis barked at Eren.

"Come on" I said to him and got ready to spar.

The day went by fast, too fast for my liking. The sparing matches was a piece of cake, the only people to give me a work out was Mikasa and a girl named Annie. Iv'e seen Mikasa numerous of times, she was always by Eren wherever he went, and saved his butt a few times too when his mouth got the better of him when talking crap to an adult. But the girl, Annie, Iv'e never met her before, nor have I heard anything about her till I saw her as a sparing partner. She was different I could say that, but the thing that got me to notice her besides her fighting, was the look in her eyes.

They were distant, cold and hard. Always looking at any and everything with a look of indifference. She reminded me of me. She had few friends, maybe two or three that I could tell. I didn't really have friends, or anyone really for that matter, which was fine by me, I don't need to get attached to anyone. It's not that I don't want friends or someone to conceder as such, but knowing that once we pick our devision, we won't be together anymore. And if they choose Scouts like me, they wouldn't be alive for long.

So in short, I don't to be distracted by friends to worry over, nor do I want to feel the pain, the heart ache of losing someone I grow close to. I can't, no I won't get attached to someone just to feel those emotions again after losing everyone who was close to me. Mother, father and best friends, losing them was enough to break me, to destroy my mental state and memories, to the point of almost me being emotionless. I still feel, everything, I relive it every night as if I was there again. I can barley manage now after these few years, if I were to lose someone now, I wouldn't be able to make it. I'm strong, that I know, but even the strong have weak points, and mine was losing people.

Time flew by pretty fast, seconds, minutes and hours turned into days, months and years. After everything we trainees went through, it was finally the time to pick where we were going. Military Police, Garrison or Survey Corp.

"Alright, I will now call the top ten of the class, those who have made it into the top ten, you have the luxury of picking Military Police, those who have not made it into the top ten, you will have to pick between the Garrison and the Survey Corp. Now then, First place: Mikasa Ackerman".

Shadis started calling out the names one by one, Eren, Armin, Jean, even Connie made it into the top ten. I was top fifteen at least, 14th place. Shadis walked by all of us and stopped right in front of me.

"If you were more of a team player and not worried so much of showing off your fighting skills, maybe you would have been in the top ten", he said and kept walking.

I don't care if I was a team player, I don't care if I was in the top ten, I didn't care about this training. The only reason I went through with this and waisted my years, was because you couldn't join the Survey Corp without training. But whatever, my end goal was still the same, I stayed after they told us to choose our devision. It was me and a handful of other people. Eren I knew stayed and of course Mikasa and Armin couldn't leave him alone. After the trainees left to pick the Garrison, the Commander of the Survey Corp walked onto the stage. There he was, the man I was soon to be fallowing blindly into battle. Erwin Smith.

He gave a not so heart warming speech to us. But what he told us was the truth, that he could not guarantee that we will all live to see the next day. That we won't grow old and have an easy life. But he did guarantee that our lives wouldn't be forgotten with him or with the other members of the Survey Corp. That our lives were not waisted, that our lives were used to make a difference and bring Humanity closer to freedom. That speech he gave was enough to make me appreciate that he was my Commander. He walked off the stage with a smaller man trailing behind him. Short black hair and walked with just as much confidence as the Commander, was Captain Levi of the Special Ops Squad.


	2. Chapter 2

It was pitch black outside and the flames on the torches were burning low by the time we were ordered to go back to our rooms. My bags were packed and everything was set for tomorrow morning, all that was left to do was wake up and go to our new home, HQ.

I laid in bed just looking up at the ceiling, wondering what the Survey Corp has in store for me, besides the obvious, fighting Titans. I looked around the room seeing the few females that stayed and wondered exactly how many of them would survive their first mission, how many would still be left after the first fight?

I shifted my eyes to look back at the ceiling. What was I thinking, if they died, they died, nothing I nor anyone else can do about it. I was hearing the other girls say their goodnights before the flames of the candles were blown out. Let the nightmares begin, I thought as I closed my eyes and let sleep and darkness over take my mind.

Dreams, nightmares, I didn't have them for the first time sense the Titans attacked years ago, it was strange, why didn't I have any nightmares? I was wracking my brain for an answer when the door to our cabin slammed open and Shadis was standing there with his usual scrawl on his face.

"Get up you lazy asses and get out here, you'll be leaving in ten minutes!", he yelled before stomping away.

I stood up and changed out of my nightclothes and into our new uniform. I put my boots on after I was done with the straps and looked around the room, making sure everything was packed away again before I left this room for good. I stepped outside and saw the other trainees running over to the cart that was going to be our ride to HQ.

"Slow down Eren, they won't leave without us", I Saw Armin trying to run and keep up with Eren and Mikasa.

I walked over to the cart that held our bags and set them to the side. I looked around and saw that almost everyone was on the cart waiting for me and two others to hurry up. I walked over to the cart and sat down with my legs hanging off the edge. If I'm going to be squished at leased my legs will be free.

"Alright is that everyone?", the driver said.

"Yeah, that's everyone", said one of the Scouts from beside us.

She was short and had ginger colored hair with soft eyes and a nice smile. She looked like a talker, I could tell already. I watched her as she climbed up onto a horse and told the driver he can go now. I didn't know I was staring for so long till she made eye contact with me and smiled.

"Hi, I'm Petra, who are you?", she asked with a sweet smile and a twinkle in her eyes.

"Janice", I said and looked away not wanting to talk to her.

"Oh, Janice, pretty name", I heard her say.

I just nodded my head as a reply and stared off into the distance.

"Don't mind her, she doesn't talk a lot, or interact a lot, in fact, she doesn't do much other then train and fight. So don't mind her, Miss Petra", I heard one of the boys say in a charming voice.

I rolled my eyes at the act he was putting for her.

"Oh, that's alright.-" I heard her say "-We could use some good fighters in the Corps. We do more then just fight and kill Titans, we will also do some undercover missions that need scouts to know hand-to-hand combat". And then I heard her horse pick up its pace and move away from my side of the cart.

Was it just me, or was she defending me against those boys? I blinked a few times pondering that thought till I was pulled out of it by those boys talking again.

"Can't she be nicer?" One of them said.

"I know, Miss Petra was just trying to have small talk", the other boy said.

I didn't pay them any mind after that, I was too busy looking at the scenery and taking in the sun and clouds. I was lost in my own mind, thinking about how different the actual Scouts were going to be compared to the training we've received. I've heard it was harder then being a trainee, but then again, I've also heard that it's about the same.

I guess it all depends on who your squad leader is and how hard they work you. Well, regardless if they work us hard or not, I'm not going to laze around and let my skills dwindle. I'm going to work just as hard, if not harder then I did in training.

By the time we got to HQ, the sun was high in the sky. I looked behind me, which was to the front of the cart that brought us here, to see Petra on her horse, ride up to someone and come to a stop in front of them, then she nodded her head and rode back to us.

"Alright guys, you can unload now and fallow me. Leave your stuff, it'll be put by your new rooms. I'll be showing you to the training grounds where we'll see which squad we'll be placing you in". She said and watched us as we all climbed out of the cart.

I scooted out of the cart and walked to the side, letting the other trainees get to where they wanted to be. Some boys made there way over to Petra, while some just walked to there friends and stood waiting. I stayed in the back of the group, walking behind everyone and being an observer was what I liked to do.

"Alright everyone, fallow me", Miss Petra said and she turned her horse around and starting walking to the side of the HQ building.

We all fallowed her around the building to the back, then we saw the training fields. It was huge, massive. There was a section for everything.

"Ok guys, you go over to those two over there, they will be the ones giving you your tests. I'll see you later", she waved and rode her horse away from us.

We looked over to the direction she pointed at and then we all walked over to the two waiting. We crossed the field and we all stood in the same spot that we gave ourselves when we fallowed Petra. The desperate boys were up front, Eren and his friends were just behind their left shoulder, a group of girls were to the right of Erens friends, and I was in the back of the group.

"Hey guys, nice to meet ya, I'm Hangi! I'll be one of the people over your placements today", an excited woman with brown hair and glasses said.

"I'm Mike, also over your placement and what exercises you'll be doing", a blonde tall man said.

There were some whispers being spread around about the two people that were standing in front of us.

"Hangi? She's the Titan scientist that does experiments and weird stuff" some were saying.

"Mike? Isn't he in Commander Erwins squad?", not much was being said about him.

"All right listen up!" Mikes voice boomed, "first we'll start off with 3DMG, so everyone go gear up and come back", he pointed to a table that was to their left, our right.

We were all hooking the gear to us when I heard foot steps approaching. I didn't pay it any mind, it was probably some scout that came out to see the fresh 'meat'. I was about done hooking the last strap on when I heard the foot steps moving away from us. By the time I was done strapping in, I looked up and saw no one new standing around our area.

I was one of the first to be geared up and done, so I walked back to stand in front of the two scouts, waiting for the rest to finish so we can start. One-by-one they made their way back to where I was standing, and with every person rejoining, I would step back away from them, putting me in the back of the group again.

"First: form a single file line, Second: you will go one at a time into the forest, reach the end and come back. The person to do this the fastest, well you did it the fastest. So get in line", the blond man said.

People were walking and moving back to fit into a line, I just stepped backwards and watched everyone. When they were done then I stepped forward and was as you guessed it, last.

Eren was one of the first to go into the forest, he made it back with eight minutes and forty-two seconds. Amin and Mikasa went after each other and Armin was Nine minutes and twelve seconds, while Mikasa was seven minutes and fifty-nine seconds.

So far Mikasa did the best and some squeaky girl was dead last she had eleven minutes and thirty-three seconds. Her excuse was priceless, she said "I was so bad cause I didn't know where I was going". Hangi replied with "when you're out in Titan territory you won't know where you're going either if you get lost, but you still have to be fast to find the scouts before you get left behind and considered dead". The girl turned a bit pale, and some of the other trainees looked a little uneasy at what Hangi just said.

What she said didn't faze me at all, I knew that the risk of being left behind was possible, It's a fight or die kind of world out there after all.

"Alright, last up" Mike said.

"Of course she's last", of course people would talk about me know.

"She'll do good though",

"Yeah, she was one of the best at this",

"If she was so great, why was she not in the top ten?",

"Cause she sucks at working with others and doesn't like to be in a team",

"She's a lone wolf",

"She hates people",

"You can go now", I glanced up at Mike and nodded.

I ran up to the forest and shot the cables out into the trees. I aimed high and used my momentum to pendulum swing myself forward, using some gas to go faster. I was flying through the air and was free falling for some of it, only to shoot the wires back out and swing up again. That's what I did to reach the end. When I landed on the tree branch that held a green flag I turned around was was flying back.

I was enjoying the wind through my hair and my time alone, but I was still able to catch a figure that was standing on a tree looking down. Who it was, I have no idea, but something in me decided to go faster, to show the new recruits and whoever that was, that I deserve to be here.

I used more gas and shifted more of my weight to propel me to go faster. I was flying, no I was hauling ass. I quickly saw the clearing approaching and was about to slow down, but then I thought, no I'm going for it.

So when I shot the cables out for the last time at the tree, I used my gas to push me backwards to slow me down and I flung myself out of the trees, still using the gas to slow down my exit and landing. I landed on the balls of my feet and bent my legs till I was kneeling on the grass. I slowly stood up and started walking to the others and looked up at the group. Their faces had looks of shock, disbelief and some where in aw.

I was standing in front of Hangi and Mike, Hangi's mouth was open and she was holding the stopwatch, Mike's face didn't change much, but his eyes were huge, like they were about to fall out of his head.

"So, whats my time?", I asked her.

"Uh, oh, yeah right" she looked at the watch and her eyes got big "Seven minutes and twenty-six seconds!" she half shrieked and yelled.

I took a step back away from her.

"No one has been able to come close to his score, let alone pass it by two seconds!" She was going on about my time and some guy.

"Hmm", was all Mike gave me, "You all can take your gear off and follow me".

Next we were standing in a dirt field, I knew what was coming next, hand-to-hand sparring.

"All right, each of you pick a partner then get into a circle, there are plenty of circles so pick one, I will tell you when to start." Mike said and walked over to the side of the dirt field.

I was looking around and was seeing everyone start pairing off and walking to a circle. I decided I would go to a circle and wait for someone to come to me, no point in waiting around. I walked down about five circles and stood to the side of one that was on the outer field. I looked up and around and saw one of the boys that was hitting on Miss Petra from earlier walking up the side and stood on the other side of the circle from me.

"Yeah, I got stuck with you" he said and folded his arms and looked away, "I won't go easy on you, so you better bring it, got it?", he said and gave me a hardened look.

I just bobbed my head and looked away, waiting for Mike to say when to start.

"Ok, so Mike had to go somewhere, but he'll be back, so I will be judging you this time!" Hangi said and was bouncing on her feet.

"You will only be done fighting your partner if you get them pinned, they tap out, or they black out! I like that last part!" she was too excited for her own good.

"Ok so, GO!" she yelled at the top of her lungs at us.

I looked at my partner and saw him get into a fighting stance inside the circle. I slowly took a few steps into the circle and brought my hands up to my face and widened my stance.

"Any day", he said.

"So go", I said back.

His face darkened a bit before he approached me with a few quick steps, and went to round house kick my left side. I slid my left leg back and stepped back out of his reach so his leg went flying past me. I wasn't going to fight him yet, I was going to see what he can do first.

He planted his right foot on the ground and quickly spun on the ball of his foot and swung up his left heel to try and strike again. Instead of me moving back again, I decided that I would hit him once. So I ducked when his heel swung up to hit me, I threw a punch to his knee and he dropped his leg and stumbled back trying to regain his balance.I stood up straight and he ran at me.

I guess this is no more mister nice guy.

He started throwing punch after punch, trying to hit my face, my stomach, my everything. When he couldn't hit me with his fists, he used his legs. And the same thing happened, he tried his hardest to land a blow, but I was deflecting everything he dished out at me.

I wasn't number one in hand-to-hand combat for nothing. How long we fought, I'm not sure, but it felt like it was way over ten minutes. A yell was given out and we were told to stop sparing. I took a step back and was about to drop my arms when the boy came at me.

"They said to stop" I told him,

"I'm not stopping until I hit you!", He threw a punch at my face.

"If you keep fighting me, I will end this", I told him and blocked his punch.

"All you can do is block, you can't fight. How did you even get the first spot if you can't hit me?" He kicked his foot out and I blocked it.

"Last warning" I said.

"NO!" he yelled and threw a punch again.

I grabbed his hand and spun around, I kicked his leg out and pull him over my shoulder and slammed him into the ground. I kept ahold of his arm and knelt down and put him in a arm bar hold.

"Are you done now?" I said looking at him.

"Get off me!" he thrashed around.

I let go of his arm, got up and backed away. I took a few steps away from him, but not taking my eyes off of him incase he was to run at me.

"Don't run away you bitch", he got to his feet and took one step, before he faltered and stopped.

"Are you deff or just plain stupid? He yelled for you to stop but you kept going, why?", A voice said from behind me.

I didn't dare to turn around and see the person the voice belonged to, cause it sounded pissed.

"Sir, she wasn't fighting back, she was just blocking", the boy said.

"So you decided to keep fighting after we yelled for you to stop, cause you couldn't hit her. Is that right?", the voice said.

"Sir, I was just trying to get her to fight", was the boy serious?

"Well then, how about I give her an order to fight you, would that satisfy you?" The voice can't be serious, right?

"Yes sir" the boy saluted even straighter.

Come on.

"Tch, Fine. You", I looked to my left and saw Captain Levi, standing beside me with a board look, but a bit of anger in his eyes.

"Yes Sir?", I saluted him.

"Fight him, and don't take too long, I already read your file", He said and walked away.

Captain Levi has read my file? Then that means he knows that I am an excellent fighter and have never lost, yet he still wants me to beat the crap out of this guy? And he said 'don't take long'. I watched him with a look of disbelief as he stood next to Hangi.

"Well?", he said.

I looked back at the boy and he got a smirk on his face, "Ready?" he said.

"Yep", I said and waiting for him to run at me.

He ran at me and like last time, I grabbed his right fist with my left hand and pulled him to me. I punched his face with my right fist twice. He tried to pull away, but I grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his face down to come in contact with my knee, when I felt his nose crunch I push him up and spun on my feet and kicked him across the face with my heel, sending him falling on his back with a loud thud. He was knocked out.

I heard a 'Hmm' come from behind me and I turned to see Captain Levi giving me a small little smirk. Mike had rejoined us and his eyebrows were raised and Hangi was gaping like a fish. The other trainees faces looked shocked again, but most of them looked like they could feel the boys pain, some of them have, they were my sparring partners once too in training.

"I didn't say kill him" Captain Levi said.

"Sorry Sir, I tried to make it fast", I said as I saluted.

Snickers and giggles with hands held to their mouths, everyone tried not to laugh.

"So you did" We all watched as he walked away.

"That was awesome!" Hangi was jumping up and down.

"Someone take him to the infirmary, go through that door and take a left, all the way down the hall to the right", Mike said, and two trainees from the group stepped out, his friends.

"We've seen what we needed to see, I'll show you where dinner will be held and to your rooms. You'll find out what squad you'll be on tonight or tomorrow". We all followed Hangi inside the building as she led us to where dinner will be held, the cafeteria. Next was our rooms. She led us back out the cafeteria door and to the right, down the hall and up the fight of stairs on the left.

"You may pick which room you want and if you want roommates, it's up to you. Your bags are over there-" she pointed to a room on the left, "-Have fun", and she walked away.

For once I was first, so I went into the room to grab my bag and walked down the hall to the last room on the left. I opened the door and saw that it had a bed on the right wall with a nightstand, a dresser on the left wall with a mirror and a closet to the left of the dresser. I walked in and kicked the door shut with my foot, walked over to sit on the bed and drop my bag my feet.

I ran my hand over the blanket and pillow to see if there was any dust on them, making sure I wouldn't be breathing in dust and sneezing my butt off. I held my hand to my face and saw it was clean, good. I stood and picked my bag up to set it on the bed and started unpacking.

I put my nightclothes and regular clothes away first in the dresser, then I hung my two extra uniforms up in the closet. I looked at the wings of freedom as I held the tan jacket in my hands, "I have finally made it", I said, just admiring the object in my hands. Years of hard work has finally paid off.

I was now an official member of the Survey Corps. I let go of the fabric and hung it up and shut the closet door. I walked over to my empty bag and put it under my bed. I glanced around the room and walked over to my window and peered out. I could see the trees and a bit of the training grounds, a nice view in my books, better then looking at the road that brought us here.

I decided to head to the cafeteria, food sounded good and walking around the new place and learning its floor plan was something I needed to familiarize myself with.

The second floor I learned were all rooms. The first floor held the cafeteria, infirmary, showers and a door leading to the basement and Hangi's lab. The third floor held the squad leaders, Captains, and Commander Erwins offices and private rooms.

Outside the building you had the road that led you to the Headquarters, to the left was a clearing with trees off in the distance, the backyard was the training grounds and to the right of the training grounds were the stables, the right side of HQ had a small garden by the buildings wall and a side door the brought you beside the staircase that led to the second floor.

I walked through the side door and walked down the hall till I came to a door on the left that opened to reveal the cafeteria. The place was busy, I looked around and saw faces I knew, but there were way more faces I don't know. I walked down the center and got in line to get dinner.

I got to the window and the man handed me a plate with a potato, piece of bread and soup in a bowl. I looked at it and walked away to find a quiet place to sit and eat. I walked to the back of the room and saw a table that no one was sitting at. I sat down my tray of food and then sat with my back to the wall, so I could look out and see everyone.

I picked up my bread and dipped it into the soup and ate it, not bad, not bad at all. I tried the potato next, it was good, you can't really mess up a potato.

I was eating and looking around and watching people. I saw some goofing off and laughing, I saw a girl keep looking at a Scout then giggling and look away, I saw Petra sit down at a table with a group of guys, when one of the guys slid over so she could sit, I saw that the guy was hiding someone, Captain Levi.

He was sitting there with a board look on his face and reading something with a cup in his hand. Why was he holding it by the rim? I thought and dipped the bread in to the soup again. I took a bite and went back looking around and was met with the steel grey eyes of the captain boring into my own.

I blinked and swallowed my food and then looked down to dip my bread again. When I looked back up he was still looking at me. I raised an eyebrow at him, wandering why he was staring for so long, then I tilted my head to the side.

Hoping he would get the hint to look away or nod or I don't know something that wasn't staring at me and making it awkward. All I saw was his eyebrows grow closer together, and his lips had a shadow of a frown on them.

What did that mean? I looked away from him and around the room. After finding nothing else to look at or watch, I looked back over to where the Captain was sitting and I saw him talking to someone at his table.

I looked down and finished my potato. I cleaned up any crumbs I had dropped and stood, gathered my tray and cup and walk over to a window where you drop off you dishes. I past them to a women who took them from me.

"Thank you", I told her.

"You're welcome sweetie", she said with a smile.

I turned around and started walking down the center lane to the door, when I glanced to the left and saw Captain Levi look up at me and then back to the guy sitting to his left. As I past I couldn't help but over hear them talking.

"Seen any good?", The guy asked.

"Tch. Their just brats", Captain Levi replied.

I past by their table and out the cafeteria door. I walked to my room to grab clothes, deciding that a nice shower would be great, and then hopefully some nightmare free sleep after the shower.


	3. Chapter 3

All of us new recruits were standing in line outside by the training field. I was all the way at the end on the left, watching as Mike and Hangi made their way down to me and told us what squad we would be signed to. When they finally got to me he looked at the paper then back to me, Hangi was smiling with all teeth and waiting by his side.

"Janice Robin, you'll be signed to Victors squad. You will report to him right away at the stables", Mike walked away and Hangi followed him as he stood in front of all of us, "You are all dismissed, and good luck with your new squad", we all saluted Mike and Hangi.

Hangi was nodding her head and mike nodded once then walked away. I started walking away from the group first, no need to stand around when I could be getting started on being a scout. I walked on the grass and over to the stables, passing by scouts training and others just sitting around and talking. I was at the front stable doors, I didn't walk in but peered in, I didn't hear anything besides the horses.

"Hello? I'm the new recruit, I'm a signed to Victors squad?", I said and let my eyes rome over the place.

"Hey!?"

I took a step away from the stable doors and turned my head to the left, seeing a medium built man, with light brown hair and tan skin walking over to me.

"Can I help you?", The man asked as he stopped a few feet in front of me.

"Yes, I'm the new recruit to Victors squad-" I turned to fully face him, "-I was told to report to him right away".

"So you're the girl that doesn't work well with others and can put a man down, huh?", He said as a smile grew on his tanned face.

"Janice Robin, Right-" he looked me up and down, "-I'm Victor, nice to meet you", he held out his hand to shake.

I looked at it for a quick second before I shook his hand.

"Thought you were gonna leave me hangin'", he said as he shook my hand.

"Don't talk much do you?", he asked and let go of my hand.

"Yes and no, I talk when I need to or feel like it. I also don't like making friends or things of that nature, sorry don't take it persanoly", I said and looked away from him.

"I guess that's where the 'doesn't work well with others' come in right?" He air quoted with his fingers.

"Exactly", I looked back at him.

"Well follow me, we're not a big squad, but you only get sent to me cause you don't fit in with the other squads. So there's just the five of us, come on", he gestured with his head and turned to walked away.

I walked behind him as he led us behind the stables to see three other people, two guys standing and talking, while the other guy was leaning against the stable wall.

"Yo, guy's, here's our new recruit. This is Janice, Janice that is-", he pointed to the first guy talking on the left, he had short black hair that was slicked back and was roughly six feet tall, with brown eyes, "-Lance, and the guy he's talking to-", he pointed to the guy across from Lance, he was a bit shorter then Lance, but not by much, he had brown hair that was shaggy and green eyes, "-that's Beck. And last but not least-", He pointed to the guy leaning against the wall. He was definitely the most unique, He was Lances hight of six foot, but his hair was a light blonde almost white and his eyes were a light crystal blue. "-that's Zane, he doesn't talk much, maybe even less then you do", Victor nudged my shoulder and I took a step away from him to the side.

"Welcome" Lance said.

"Hello, hope we work well" Beck did a small wave.

I looked over to Zane and he just nodded his head once, more like a bob then a nod I guess.

"Uh, hi", I said and did a 'one arm hand wave windmill' thing.

"Alright, well now that you know our names and we know you, what should we do for our first day as a new member squad? Any requests?", Victor asked all of us.

Beck just stared at him like he was crazy or had two heads, Lance had a small smile on his face like he was humored by his squad leaders antics, and Zane just looked away from us. I looked at him with a blank look wandering what he did to become a squad leader.

"No one? No? Ok then, how about we,-"

"- no", and Zane walked away.

Oh, I'm gonna like him. We all watched as Zane walked away from us and around the stables out of sight. Lance, Beck and I turned to see Victor, his head was tilted down looking at the grass like someone just told his puppy.

"I'm gonna eat", I looked up and saw Beck walk besides us.

"I'll second that", Lance walked by Victor and smacked him on the shoulder, "come on Leader, let's get some grub", and Lance pulled Victor by the arm and Victor stumbled a bit trying to catch his footing from being dragged sideways.

"You coming Jan?", Lance yelled back to me.

Jan? Was that a nickname or something? God, I hope not.

"It's Janice", I said and walked up to them.

"Not a fan of nicknames?" Lance asked while still dragging Victor.

"No", I told him.

"So we have another Zane on our hands, but hey, at least you talk more then he does, but just so you know, Zane is one hell of a listener if you ever need to talk, and if he feels like it, maybe he'll reply to you". Lance shoved Victor through the door to the cafeteria and he tripped and stumbled again. Lance then turned to me and gave me a smile then walked in himself.

We were all sitting at the empty table in the back corner. I was sitting with my back to the wall beside Zane, while Beck sat across from me, Lance to his right and Victor to his left. What a weird group to put together, but then again, Victor did say that we were the ones that didn't fit in with the other squads, so in other words, we were the reject pile.

It made sense in a way, I mean here you have Victor, an easy go lucky guy with a hyper attitude. Like Hangi but in male form I guess, so why wasn't he in her squad? Beck, He hasn't done much to show who he is yet. Lance though, I could almost guess that he used to be like Victor, but some things have happened and now he is more mellowed out and goes with the flow. Zane, he was my favorite so far, quiet, didn't talk, perfect for me to be around.

"So guys, I heard at dinner tonight that the Commander will be making a speech, so you have to show up, ok?" Victor told all of use, just before he stuffed a huge chunk of bread in his mouth.

"K," I said and went back eating my food, Lance gave a thumbs up and Beck said "Ok", Zane just bobbed his head and ate his stew.

I took a bite of food and looked around the room, looking at Eren and Jean bicker back in forth while Armin tried to calm them down, poor little guy never stands a chance. Mikasa stood up and was saying something to Eren that made him calm down just a bit, but then Jean said something and Eren was heated again. But none of them seen Captain Levi getting more and more ticked off by the second by their bickering. I saw him stand up and march over to their table, everyone he past on his way quieted, he was right behind Eren and Jean and grabbed both of them by the back of the neck and face slammed them into the table top, making the dishes that held their food rattle.

"If you two don't shut the hell up, I will make both of your asses clean this entire cafeteria. Got it?" he said loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Yes Sir. Sorry Sir", Jean said and scrambled out of his hold to salute him.

"Sorry Captain Levi, won't happen again", Eren said while also trying to saluting.

"Tch. See to it that it doesn't", and Captain Levi walked away from their table, leaving behind a fuming Mikasa.

Armin was holding onto Mikasas's arm so she wouldn't go after the Captain, Jean was sitting down and rubbing his neck, while Eren was sitting down rubbing his head. I looked over and saw the Captain, still having a ticked off look on his face as he sat down at his table. The other people sitting with him were all talking amongst themselves while he just sat there, sipping his tea.

"If you look any harder Jan, you'll give him a hole in his tea glass", I redirected my eyes to look at Victor and saw him giving me a smirk.

"I was watching Eren and Jean get into a yelling match, then Captain Levi grab them and slam their face on the table. If that is what you are referring to, then ok", I said and took a bite of my stew.

"Mmm hmm", Victor went back eating his food.

I risked glancing up and at Captain Levi again, I saw him say something to someone at his table then pick up his tea glass and close his eyes, when he reopened them, they were looking right at me. What was it with him and giving people hardened looks? His body was calm and collected, but his eyes were alive and on fire, they held all his emotions, and what I was seeing right now, was aggravation and curiosity. What a mix to be feeling. I brought my fork out of my mouth and sat in in the bowl of stew, I looked away from the Captain and out the window that was behind and away from him. Grey clouds were moving by the window and the wind was blowing them quickly by, I wonder if there is going to be rain soon? I hope so, I love the rain, though I love thunderstorms even more. Feeling the rain droplets fall on your skin after a rough work out, smelling the water in the air and coolness it brings. Hearing the thunder role across the sky and trees, seeing lightning shoot across the sky and light it like a candle in a dark room. It's peaceful to me, feeling and hearing everything a storm has to offer.

"Well, I'll see you guys later", Lance stood up and walked away to give his dishes to the cleaning lady.

"Me too, bye", Beck stood up and did the same.

"Tomorrow training will start for us, so be out at the stable by nine, ok?", Victor told me and Zane before he stood up to leave.

"What a weird group", I said and put the last chunk of bread in my mouth.

"But, we're protective and safe", Zane said before he looked at me and nodded. Pain flashing threw his light blue eyes so fast that I thought I imagined it.

"What's safe when we're in the Scouts? Protective? I don't need protecting, just let me die if it is to happen, I don't want to take someone with me", I said and stood up and gathered my tray.

"If being protective saves you but kills them, then just let them die", Zane said as I past behind him.

I looked back at him and saw a far off look in his eyes, what happened to this man for him to say things like that, what happened to him for him to have so much pain? I know being in the Scouts you lose people, but he looks and behaves like he lost more then friends, and even family. I turned around from him and went back on my way to drop off my tray to the dish lady.

"Thank you ma'am", I said to her.

"Oh, you're welcome sweetie", she said and smiled at me.

I walked away from her and down the center isle, a place in mind outside on the roof to see the clouds roll by. I glanced at Zane one more time before I walked out the door and his eyes were still unfocused, but he was standing up and cleaning his area. I walked out the door and shook my head, don't get close to them, you don't need it. I walked up the stairs that led me to the roof and I stepped out the door. The wind was blowing and birds were flying by to the trees. I walked over to the side of the small town, sat down and leans against it. I was right, it did look like it was going to rain, maybe not just yet, but it was going to, maybe before dinner or during. I just had to wait.

I heard the Scouts down below training at fighting, 3DMG and horse back ridding. I scooting closer to the edge and looked down to see the different things going on. One poor kid was getting his butt handed to him at sparring, someone else was getting scolding for using too much gas and a tiny girl was trying to get up on a massive horse.

"What are you doing up here?", I looked behind me and saw Captain Levi looking down at me from beside the tower.

"Sitting, relaxing, waiting for the rain to come, Sir", I looked him over as we were just staring at each other. His uniform was well pressed, not a single wrinkle or crease. His cravat was pure white like it was brand new, his brown boots were so well polished it makes one think that they have never been worn. His hair was cut and trimmed perfect for his bob undercut look. Nothing on this man was out of place.

"Aren't you suppose to be training?", he question not taking his grey eyes off me.

"Squad Leader Victor gave us the day off, training starts tomorrow, Sir", I told him and I stood up.

I dusted my pants off and hands before I stood straight to look at the Captain again.

"Was there something you needed of me, Sir?", I asked.

"Cut the 'Sir' crap, it's Captain Levi to you brat", he said, "and when you approach me or see me or I call for you, you will salute me, or did they not teach you that in training?" He went from being agitated to pissed off in a matter of seconds.

Who knew this guy was set off so easily and quickly? I knew he was rude, but dang.

I straightened up and saluted him.

"Sorry Captain Levi, it was my mistake, I won't let it happen again", I looked him dead in the eyes and kept mine blank, if he wanted a solder right now, he was gonna get one, cause if there was one thing I was good at, it was following orders to the 'T'.

"Tch. You piss me off", he spun on his heels and walked out of the door that opens to the roof.

What was that about? I wonder what his whole point was of coming here and I guess talking to me? I don't know. I sat back down and leaned against the tower again. I stretched my legs out and crossed my ankles. I put my hands in my lap and shut my eyes. I let the sun and breeze relax me enough to where I was able to take a nap.

"Run!" I yelled at my legs to run, to move, to do anything, to get me out of this Titans path.

Tears were running down my face and was mixing with the rain that was falling side-ways as the storm was roaring above my head. I looked behind me and saw the Titan in all its big ugly glory walking to me, that's right it was walking not running.

I never knew Titans to not run at their kill, they were always running like the blood lust crazed thing they are. I looked back at my feet and trying to move them was like trying to move a tree, they wouldn't budge. I was pulling and trying to jump, something to get my legs to move, but they wouldn't.

I twisted and looked back around and saw the Titan was only a few meters away from me. It reached down for me and wrapped its hand around me and lifted me up like I was a feather. I was hitting its hand with my fists and trying to kick my legs, I knew nothing would work, but I still had to do something, even if it was useless. It held me in front of its face and just looked at me, then slowly it opened its mouth and lifted me above its teeth, and dropped me in.

My eyes opened wide and I threw myself forward and was grabbing my legs while trying to catch my breath. It was a dream, it was a dream. I kept repeating to myself over and over. I calmed down enough to register that it had started to rain. I looked up at the sky and shut my eyes, letting the rain pelt my face while still trying to rid myself of the mini nightmare I just had. and calm my breathing.

"You ok?", I jumped, startled by a voice that was beside me and turned to look at the person.

"Yeah", I said and started to stand up.

"I heard screaming and things moving from up here when I was down there talking to the other scouts. I wondered what was going on so I came up here, I was going to wake you, but you woke up as I got beside you. Sorry If I scared you" Victor stood up with me, making sure I didn't fall or something.

It started to rain harder with every second we stood out here.

"That's ok-" I said, "-sorry I worried you. It was just a nightmare, I'm good", I started to walk past him when he lifted his hand to my shoulder and squeezed it, making me come to a stop and look at him.

"I know you don't know me-", he started, "- and I know you don't want to know me do to personal reasons, I get that, but we are a team now and I am your leader, you can talk to me if you want to vent about anything", he lifted his hands up in front of his face, "-and hey, I won't even talk if you don't want me too", he gave me a goofy smile and dropped his hands to his side.

"Now come on, I'm drenched and so are you, let's get dried off and changed", he bobbed his head and turned away from me and headed for the door.

I stood on the rain for a few more seconds, just letting what he said to me sink in as I watch him walk away. Him, someone to talk too? I couldn't do that, I couldn't do that to myself, reliving the past, a dang sure couldn't do that to him. If he knew about my past, my parents, my friends, he would never be able to get the look of pity out of his eyes every time he looked at me.

I didn't need his pity nor did I want it, I didn't need anyones pity. Dealing with my own pity and sorrow was enough, and sometimes it was too much for me to even bare, where the only way to deal with my emotions, was to turn them off and not feel anything, to be void of everything.

"You coming?", I looked up at Victor from the roofs floor and see his head sticking out of the door frame, rain drops sliding down his face and his hair sticking to his cheeks.

"Yeah", I said and looked down away from him as I took the first step towards the door.

The silence between us was defining, we both didn't say or utter a sound as we descended the stars. The only thing you heard was our boots squeaking as they made contact with the next step. I took the last step and I saw someone run past the opening of the stars. I took a step out and saw two more scouts running down the hall towards us.

"Can't believe it", a scout said as he past us.

"He's gonna die!", The other said.

"Wonder what's going on?", Victor said and stepped around me.

He started walking down the hall to the flight of stairs that led to the first floor. I was curious also, so I followed. We walked to the door that led outside and saw a group of scouts forming a circle. Did they not know it was rain out there? I took a step out of the door to get a better look, I'm already wet, why not.

"Man", I heard Victor walking behind me.

"Come on guy's, we're gonna get in trouble!", Was that Armin?

I heard as we got closer.

"Oh, shut it Arlert, he started it!", said a male voice.

Was this a fight?

"Yeah Jeager! Come on!", Was that Jean?

Victor and I looked at each other and pushed the scouts out of the way so we could see what was going on. Yep, it was Jean and Eren, giving each other a glare down, and there was Armin, holding onto Erens arm, trying to pull him back away from Jean so he wouldn't do anything stupid. Where was Mikasa? I looked around and couldn't spot the black haired girl anywhere.

"Let go Armin, or you'll get hurt", Eren told his friend.

"No, stop it you guy's", Armin tried again, tugging his arm.

"Move!" Eren shoved Armin away and he almost hit the ground, but Victor was fast enough to catch him.

Eren attacked Jean and Jean wasn't holding back either. They were punching and blocking each others fist and kicks that were thrown. Mud was being kicked everywhere.

"What started this" I looked to see Victor asking Armin.

"Well, Jean said something about Eren seeing the Titans and stuff and it made Eren mad, and well, you know how hot headed Eren gets and how arrogent Jean is", Armin winced as he saw Eren get hit in the stomach.

"Come on Janice, let's stop this", Victor said to me.

"Uh, why?", I asked.

If two hot headed teenagers wanted to duke it out in the rain over something stupid, I wasn't going to get involved and have myself get in trouble too.

"Really? Come on, if we're caught here watching and didn't try to stop it, we'll get in trouble", Victor reasoned with me.

"Fine. Who do you want, Eren or Jean?", I asked.

"Eren", he said and went forward.

Of course he would leave me with the bigger kid and the one more skilled at fighting then Eren.

"Jean, stop", I said as I got closer to him.

"No!", he yelled.

Well, I tried to talk. When Jean went to kick Eren, I kicked Jeans knee and made him drop to the ground and mud splattered all over his pants.

"Hey!" Jean yelled at me.

I saw Victor grab Eren from behind in a bear hug, he was sliding in the mud, but he kept his hold. I looked back at Jean and saw him get up and run at Eren. Eren leaned back having Victor support his weight making him stumble a bit in the mud, before Eren kicked his feet up and hit Jean in the chest, giving him two muddy boot prints on his wet white shirt.

Jean stumbled back a few steps before regaining his balance, then went to punch Eren. I Stepped up and grabbed Jean from the back of his shirt and yanked him back, I heard a button 'pop' and a few stitches 'snap'. I pulled Jean behind me and threw him on the muddy ground, stepping on his chest so he wouldn't get up again. Now, I'm angry.

"That is enough!" I raised my voice so they both would stop trying to get at each other.

I looked at Jean under my muddy boot, and I could see he paled a bit and his eyes were wide and he was breathing hard. When I was mad, I heard I was a bit scary.

"Stay down and knock this shit off!", He flinched a little.

I shot Eren a look and he stopped moving and was holding onto Victors arms. He too, also paled a bit.

"Eren, knock your shit off right now!" His eyes got a little big and I could see Victor peek from behind Erens shoulder to look at me. "What has gotten into you two?-" I looked at both of them then stopped on Eren, "-so he said something to you when you were talking about Titans and what not, get over it. You know what you saw and heard.-",

I looked at Jean who was still under my muddy boot, "-and you. You think you know everything and that by down grading someone that makes you look smarter, and that being arrogant is cool? You're just acting like a spoiled prick that doesn't no anything? Get over yourself" I pushed down on his chest a little before I removed my boot and took a step back.

I looked back at Eren and Victor, then looked around me and saw the other scouts look a bit scared and took an uneasy shift on their feet.

"Leave", I said to them, and they walked away without any fuss, some looked happy and relieved to walk away from the seen, or me.

I looked and saw Victor let go of Eren and Eren took a few steps away from all of us, wiping his hand over the side of his face to remove the trail of blood that had dripped down from a cut he got from Jean. I looked and saw Jean stand and look at the mud all over his uniform and take a step back away from me when he saw I was looking at him. I looked at Victor last and he looked surprised to say the least.

"Think before you act. If Commander Erwin, Hangi, Mike and even Captain Levi didn't see something in you, trust you and your Titan shifting ability, they wouldn't have risked everything to keep you out of the MP's hands" I told Eren.

"I'm going to change now", I said and turned on my heels and walked to my room.

"Was it just me, or does she remind you of someone when she's mad and when her hair's down?", I heard Eren ask.

"Yeah, she looked a bit like Captain Levi with her hair down like that and that look on her face", Jean said.

"Yeah, Freaky", Victor commented.

I was drenched to the bone, and now I was muddy on top of that. I walked up the stairs and down the hall to my room to grab a change of clothes so I could shower. Before I opened my door, I saw a trail of muddy foot prints that led to where I'm standing now, great.

"Man, I'm gonna have to clean that". I huffed.

I opened my bedroom door and walked inside and shut it. I grabbed a towel and sat it on top of my dresser, and pulled my clean uniform from the closet along with my soap, shampoo and conditioner. I picked up everything and walked out my room and down the hall. I heard foot steps coming up the stairs then I saw who it was. He was wearing a discussed look on his face and was not pleased. I saw his eyes follow the muddy foot prints on the floor up to my boots, up my legs, over my chest and rested on my face.

"Why the hell is there mud everywhere?", he growled out.

"I was outside breaking up a fight and got muddy in the process trying to stop it Captain", I told him and stood up straight.

His eyes were scanning my face looking for something or staring at something.

"Who was it?"

"Sir, it was Eren and Jean".

"Hmph, figures", he mumbled under his breath then looked away and crossed his arms, then he looked back at me.

"Get cleaned up" he pointed with his finger to a door on his left, my right, "cleaning supplies are in there when you're done showering. I expect this place clean before dinner", and he walked back down the stairs.

I waited till he was down the stairs and out of sight before I walked down the stairs and to the showers. No one was in here when I walked in to the showers, great. I liked taking showers that were quiet, it made it more relaxing. I turned the shower on and set the temperature to how I liked it.

I stepped back and undressed, leaving my soiled uniform on the floor by the bench, then stepped under the water, letting it wash off the mud that soaked through the clothing. I just got my hair wet to wash it when I heard someone some in.

"Oh, hey, Janice right?", I wiped water from my eyes and saw Petra putting her stuff on a bench in front of her shower stall.

"Yeah" I said and put shampoo in my hand and started washing my hair.

"I'm Petra, incase you forgot", she said and started her shower.

"I remember", I said and rinsed my hair.

She didn't say anything else. I got the feeling that eyes were on me and I turned around and saw Petra staring at me.

"What?", I asked, it was kinda creepy, her just staring at me like that.

"Oh, I'm so sorry to stare at you like that, I just saw the scar on your back, and got curious", she said.

"It's nothing", I told her and reached for my conditioner.

"Can you tell me?", She asked looking at me with a soft look on her face.

"No", I said and shut my eyes to lather up my hair.

"Sorry", she said and I peeked my eyes open and saw look of hurt pass over her features as she walked to her shower stall.

She didn't need to know, and I wasn't about to relive it to tell her how I got this scar.

I was clean, dressed and heading back to my room to drop off my dirty clothes, then to get to work cleaning the floor. I grabbed the supplies I needed and got to work. It didn't take me too long, maybe an hour at most to clean up my muddy foot prints.

I put the supplies back where I got them and put the rag in a bucket that held other dirty rags. I walked out the door and decided that it should be getting close to dinner, so I walked to the cafeteria and got in line to get my food. I was sitting at the table that I sat at last time with my 'team' and started eating.

I had my fork in my mouth when Zane sat beside me. I looked at him and he started eating. I wasn't going to ask why he decided to sit there beside me and not on the other side, when Lance and Beck sat down across from us.

"Hey Jan, Zane", Beck said and dug into his food.

"Sup, guy's" Lance greeted and took a sip of his drink.

"Guess Zane let's someone sit beside him now after all this time", and there's Victor.

He plopped down beside Beck and looked at Zane. Zane just looked at him with a blank look, but his eyes were telling Victor something.

"Chill, eat", he said and pointed to Zane's food with his fork.

Zane just looked down and started eating his food again. Victor started eating with a smile on his face like nothing happened, Beck exchanged looks with Lance then glanced at me and started eating. Was I missing something here? I looked at all the guys and they were either looking at their food or around the room.

"Oh, here comes Commander Erwin", Lance said and we all looked at the Commander as he walked in the room.

"Good evening everyone, and welcome new recruits", he said and looked around the room.

"I have an announcement to make. In two weeks time we will be going on an expedition outside the walls, we will be trying a new formation which your squad leaders will learn and train you on. On this expedition, we will also be capturing two Titans to bring back as experiments. So prepare yourselves for the up coming expedition, train hard and be safe. I'll see you out there". Commander Erwin finished saying and he walked out of the cafeteria, leaving the room in total silence.

After everything he said started to sink in, chatter started to slowly fill the room again and conversations went back to normal. So, two weeks huh? That's all that was on my mind, the expedition. Our table finished eating in silence and we all went our separate ways.

I was heading to my room, needing to lay down and think about what I was to be encountering outside the walls. I was about to pass the table that held Captain Levi and his squad, I heard Petra talking about me and how she saw a diagonal scar on my back that stretched across it from hip to shoulder.

I heard the Captain, "Tch, everyone has scars Petra", and he sipped his tea.

"I know, but she only just became a solder", Petra said.

"Not everyone has an easy life. Some have fought and suffered to survive" the Captain said.

I looked at Petra as I past her side of the table and she looked at me, wide eyes and a blush was on her cheeks. I looked away and kept walking. I heard one of the guys laugh and another snicker.

"Way to go there Petra" One of them said.

"Yeah, I don't think she heard you at all", said another in between his laughing.

"Oh man", I heard her say.

"Tch".

I walked out of the cafeteria and over to the stairs. It was time for bed, not a nap. I climbed he stairs and walked to my room, boots clicking with every step I took. I opened my door and stepped in and kicked it shut with the heel of my boot. I sat on the edge of my bed and took my boots off, setting them at the foot of my bed for easy access incase I needed them for emergencies. I peeled back the blanket and crawled under it. Hopefully tomorrow will be more eventful then stopping a fight.


	4. Chapter 4

Screams echoed through my head and black filled my vision. What was going on? What was happening? Thoughts and questions filled my head with everything else. 'Voices, I need to focus on those'. I tried to focus, but they just sounded like muffled noise. There were two voices, no three, I think.

Two male and one female, I believe. I tried moving my hands and found them to be heavy to move, next I tried shifting my legs and found out that they too, were heavy. I moved my head a bit and found that only makes the throbbing headache worse. But I had to get up, something was telling me, in my gut, to get up.

I dragged my legs under me and shifted my arms and hands to push up my torso, so I could lean back on my knees and legs. I opened my eyes, or at least tried to and I could barley make out figured blobs. Trying to keep my head up straight and not moving was hard, cause for some reason, it just liked to role to one side and to the other.

"Oh ho, Look Mark, she's awake", I heard one of the male voices say.

"She sure it Chris", this guy 'Mark' I guess answered him.

"Now that you are back with us, you can watch us take your friend from you", this 'Mark' guy said to me.

"No", I looked at them and tried to stand, but a hand was placed on my chest and shoved me backwards and my head hit a wall, I slid to the ground again, falling on some bottles and trash.

"Don't worry girly, you'll be next", 'Chris' said to me.

I opened my eyes and everything was slowly becoming clearer. The two guys were surrounding my friend and grabbing her wrist and arms. She was trying to push them off of her and kick them away, but they were faster and stronger then her. They had her pinned to the wall and was trying to muffle her screaming voice with their hand.

"Now now, we don't want to end our fun now do we?" Mark asked her.

I heard a soft whimper escape past her lips. No, I can't let this happen, I won't let this happen. I couldn't fight them, I was too weak, what could I do? I felt around for something, anything, but there was nothing and I doubt a bottle would stop these guy's right now.

I did the only thing I could do, Scream. I sucked in as much air as I could fit in my lungs and I scream bloody murder. I looked at my friend and saw the two guys let her go and cover their own ears. They turned around and saw me screaming and walked towards me and went to hit me, but I ducked and stepped back away from them.

I took another quick breath and screamed again, hoping desperately that someone would hear me. I looked at the man Chris as he brought his fist back and went to strike me, I moved and he missed, but his friend Mark didn't, he kicked me in the side and I fell to the ground groaning from the pain that was shooting up my side.

"You noisy, filthy, trash" with every insult he would kick my side.

I looked up and saw that my friend, Beth had only taken a few steps away from where she was standing before they left her for me.

"Run!" I yelled out to her, but the guys quickly turned around and caught her before she could make it five steps.

"Ha, you think you're so smart" Chris said.

Chris yanked on Beth's hair and she yelped.

"Stupid brats", Mark mumbled.

Chris shoved Beth agains the wall for the second time, and Mark stood to the side putting his hands on her shirt.

Please no! Please!

"Hey, what do you think you're doing!?" I tilted my head up and saw an MP looking down the ally we were in.

"HELP!" I screamed at the MP and his face went from curiosity to anger.

"We need to go, like now Mark" I saw Chris back away from Beth.

Thank God.

"For giving us trouble, brats", Mark pulled out something shiny from his pants and pushed it into Beth's stomach.

"NO!" I screamed at the man who just stabbed Beth and he gave me a wide smile showing all his teeth.

I saw Mark and Cris run away from Beth as her body fell to the ground. At the same time, I heard foot steps running to where we were and they past me and made chase after the two men. When Beth fell to the ground, one of the MP's were trying to stop the bleeding. I tried to push myself up, but I couldn't, so I settled for crawling. I dragged myself over to her and she tilted her head to look at me when I got closer, and I saw tears streaming down her face.

"No, Beth, Please don't leave me", I said in between tears and sobs that were slowly trying to make there way out.

"Tell my family I love them, please" Beth whispered out.

"Beth, no, you tell them", tears were escaping my eyes.

"I can't", her voice was getting softer.

"I can't stop the bleeding, I'm trying, but the cut is too deep" the MP said to us.

"Jan Jan, I love you, don't ever forget that. I'm sorry, I'll see you next time", she talked till her voice faded and her eyes dulled in color.

I lost it.

I cried and screamed holding her to me, holding her head to my chest and wrapping my arms around her shoulders, just slowly rocking back and forth. I was saying something I'm sure I was, but I didn't know what I was saying, everything was foggy. My vision, my hearing, my head. Nothing was making sense to me anymore. All I knew, was that my best friend Beth Crow, was now dead.

"Miss", someone put a hand on my shoulder and spoke, " we have the Military Police waiting to take her body to her family, and we would like you to tell us what happened when we get the their house. I can tell you we caught the guys who did this, and with your help, we can insure it won't happen again. Ok?", I heard a male voice say.

I just nodded my head.

"Can you let her go so we can pick her up?", I repacked my arms and let them pick her up and set her on a cart that was behind us.

"Can you stand?", the male voice asked.

I shook my head.

"I'll help you", he said.

I felt a pair of arms reach around my chest and heave me up to try and stand on my feet. I was able to stand, but walking was another story. I would stumble and almost fall, or my legs would give out and I would almost fall. In the end, the MP decided to stay by my side and let me lean on him till we got to Beth's house.

I knocked on the door and her mother answered. She had a smile on her face till she saw how I looked, then she looked behind me and saw her daughter. Her face fell and the look she had on would shatter everyone's heart. She pushed past me and ran to her daughter, screaming and crying in agony. I glanced behind me and saw her kneeling down on the ground, holding her daughters arm to her chest as she cursed God and everyone who was with him.

The day dragged on in agony as I relived what happened. I had to tell the MP's and Beth's Parents what all happened in the ally. The MP's jotted everything down I said in their note books, While Beth's Parents looked at each other in horror. I looked down at the table the whole time I told the story. I could't look at her Parent's, I couldn't see what it was doing to them with what I had to say. My teary face was dry and all feeling I had in my body was gone, numb.

"We have what we needed" the MP's stood up and gave their condolences to the couple.

"We will walk you home, Janice", the Male MP Dan said.

I stood up and turned to her Parents, "I'm so sorry", I whispered to them while looking at he floor.

"It's ok, there was nothing you could have done", her Dad said to me.

"It's ok sweetie go home and rest", Her Mom said.

I tried not to let anymore tears leak from my eyes. I turned around and start staggering towards the door before the MP Dan, helped me walk out of their house.

* * *

My eyes slowly open and I felt tears running down my cheeks. I reached a hand up and felt that I had been crying. I took a deep breath and stared at the ceiling. Why of all days did I dream about her? It wasn't even close to the day she past, so why was I thinking about her?

I blinked my eyes to try and clear my vision. I wiped the rest of the tears away from my cheeks and eyes and rolled over to stare out the window. It was still dark out, but you could see that it was starting to lighten. I stayed snuggled in my blanket, enjoying the warmth and comfort that it gave me.

'knock knock'

I glanced at the door, 'who's that?' I thought but didn't move. I didn't have to be out of bed and ready for another forty-five minutes. I was going to stay relaxing till then.

'knock knock', "Oi, open up", I male voice said.

Was that Captain Levi? it can't be, or I guess it could be, but I don't think It would be. I sat up and threw the covers off my legs and swung them over the edge of the bed and padded over to the door. I unlocked the door, turned the handle and opened the door to see, in fact Captain Levi standing before me.

"Yes, Captain?", I asked.

What does he want so early in the morning?

"I heard screaming and crying as I was walking by earlier, I had shit to do, so I came back now", He looked bored.

"Oh, I'm sorry if I woke anyone. I had a bad dream" I looked down as I said that, "I won't let it happen again", I looked back up at him and shifted on my feet as his eyes didn't move nor blink.

It's like he was calculating something about what I had said. His stare though, It was making me a bit uneasy.

"Tch, whatever, brat", he turned and walked away from my door and down the hall.

Awkward, was all I could think of to some up the weird exchange we just had. I shook my head and shut the door, locking it as I went back to my bed and covered up again and got warm.

TIME SKIP: 2 days before expedition.

"Hey Jan, ready to train?", I looked up from my sitting position by a tree, to see Victor jogging up to me.

"I just finished with 3DMG, I'm taking a break now", I told him and went back reading a book I got from the library.

"Oh, really? Well alright then. What else are you going to train on?" He walked towards me and sat down a few feet away from my side, but still close enough to enjoy the shade of the tree.

I put my finger on the sentence I was at to save my place, "I don't know, maybe just run a bit and horse back ridding" I said and looked back at the spot I was reading.

I barley managed to get four words in before Victor opened his mouth, "Cool, do you mind if I join you for the ridding part?", he asked me.

Again I placed my finger to save my spot, "I guess, it's not like I can tell you no", I gave him an aggravated look, hoping he would get the hint to leave me alone to read.

"Cool, thanks. Well then I'll see ya. I'm gonna see what Lance is doing, bye", he stood up and waved to me and walked away.

What a weird Leader I have. I looked down at the page I was on and removed my finger to get back to the sentence I was reading.

* * *

It was a book about a Princess who grew up losing everyone she cared for. A curse was placed on her parents that their first born would only know of heartache. She was only cursed, cause her parents had everything and never knew of heartache themselves, her parents also treated everyone else with distain and disgust. The last time they treated someone poorly, it was a young boy, teenager, who was dirty and wearing old rags as clothes.

He asked for something to eat or even something small like a glass of water. The parents treated him with hurtful words and a slammed door in the face. He knocked on the door again, and the father opened the door and saw the same teen standing there. This time the man was furious, he yelled up a storm and was cursing at the teen to leave his castle and never return.

The man was worked up and breathing heavily. The teen took a step back and said 'I gave you your last chance', the teen raised his hands above his head and brought them down, the man covered his eyes as the wind blew leaves and dirt around in the air, after a few seconds when everything was settled, the man looked at the teen that was standing before him, and saw a man in his mid twenties standing there, no longer a teen.

"What is this magic?", The man said.

The now man answered him, "I am a warlock, I grant people wishes or curses. I came here today to give you your last chance, but you wasted it. I will leave here today, giving you a curse. May your child be born and only experience and know of heartache. That is your punishment", the Warlock turned around and started walking away.

"Ha, You're not real, magic, doesn't exist!" the man slams the door.

The Warlock turned towards the door and closed his eyes, whispering a spell under his breath, when he was done he apologized, "I'm sorry that you have to suffer for your parents mistakes", he said and walked away.

I read the whole book and was on the last two pages, it was sad, but in the end she did find true love, but how she found it was sad. True the the Warlocks word, she only knew of heartache. Every friend she made, every pet she owned, every castle maid she got close to, would either get sick and had to leave or they died.

The one person she got closest too, was a boy who cleaned the horses stables, they were close friends for years and he was her most dearest friend. They were both in their mid twenties when tragedy struck, a horse got lose and knocked the boy down and he hit his head on a rock.

The princess saw everything and rushed to her friend, but there was nothing to be done to save him. He was already gone. By the time she was thirty, she had decided that she had lived with sadness enough, on the night of her thirtieth birthday, she took her own life. The Warlock that placed the curse on her, watched as she ended her life. He stepped out from behind the shadows of a trees and walked over to her ghost.

"I am sorry you had to suffer, your parents told you why you were cursed?" He asked her and she replied with a sorrowful 'yes'.

"To apologize to you for making you suffer, I have a gift for you", he pointed to the tree behind him.

"A gift?", she tilted her head to the side.

She looked to where the Warlock was pointing and saw her old friend, the stable boy, walk out from behind the tree.

"But how? You're suppose to be dead?" She ran up to him and huged him.

"I am, but then again, so are you", he told her.

The End.

* * *

I closed the book and sat it in my lap, what a sad book. I looked up at the tree leaves above me, your life is nothing but sadness, but you find happiness in death. Why do I feel like I just ready a book about myself? But in really life, at least for a Survey Corps members, this was like our personal diary. We make friends and lovers, but not everyone makes it back from outside the walls, but we see them all again when we die.

I stood up and walked back inside to the library, placing the book back in its spot on the shelve. I turned to look out the window that was beside the shelves. Well, time to start training again.


	5. Chapter 5

I walked back outside and welcomed the breeze that ruffled my hair and brushed my face. I looked around and didn't see anyone from my squad, so I walked to the horse stables to saddle up a horse they'll let me use.

I walked through the front sliding doors and I see a scout walk out from a small room in the back.

"Excuse me?" I yelled and the person turned to face me.

"Yeah?", The soldier walked up to me.

"Um, I was wandering if there was a horse I could use to train on, I'm new" I asked him.

He was a good eight inches taller than me and had short brown hair with brown eyes.

"Any horse past the office still needs a Scout, so pick which ever one you want", he said and walked away.

"Cool" I said to myself and started walking down the center of the stables to pick a horse I wanted.

I walked down the center looking left and right, seeing what horse I would fit with. I saw two I liked. One was a 13 hands chestnut, the tag said it had a laid back personality and was named Buck. The second horse I saw was in the last stall on the left. He was at least 16 if not 17 hands tall, black thoroughbred. I read the tag and I new he was mine. It read 'lazy but fast, agile and don't piss me off' and the name: Champion.

"Yep, I like ya", I took a step towards his stall and he looked at me while he was eating hay, snorted and turned back to his sack of food.

I stood on a stool and leaned my hand in to see if he'd let me pet him. He just turned his head and sniffed my hand with hay sticking out of his mouth and went back eating. This must be the lazy part. I stepped off the stool and slide the stall door open, he took a step back and turned his whole body to face me.

"Hey boy, I'm Janice, want to work together?", I held my hand out seeing if I can pet him, he just stared at me like I was crazy. So I leaned forward and touched his nose, then his head, he moved only to get more hay and then looked back at me.

"I guess you found a horse" I looked to see Zane standing beside me.

"I guess so" I went back looking at Champion.

"He's seen allot of stuff, we all have", Zane told me about the horse.

"But he is loyal I'll give him that", Zane said and walked away.

I watched Zane as he walked around the corner and out of sight.

"Strange" I thought out loud and looked to see the horse giving me a sideways glance.

"What?" I asked the horse and he just snorted.

I reached up beside his stall and grabbed a lead rope and clipped it on him and walked him out in to the walkway. I tied him up and went to get the tack and saddle him up. He was a goodbye I'll tell you that. He wasn't fussy or moody, he just stood there and did nothing. I had him saddled and ready and unhooking him to walk him out the field. He walked beside and kept pace, when I stopped he stopped.

I turned to him and petted his head before I put my foot in the stirrup and lifted myself to sit on his back. Wow, it was really tall up here.

"Ok, let's take it slow and get to know each other, ok Champion?" I asked the horse and we started off walking around the area.

We walked three laps and weaved around a few trees, after thirty minutes or so I decided to try trotting and a bit of jogging. We were having fun, we were running around trees and jumping over obstacles in the field that were suppose to resemble fallen trees or something.

We rode by a few soldiers and they were staring and us, wide eye and mouths open. We walked over to a troff and I hopped off and let him drink, I tied him to the beam that was there and went to sit on a tree stump. I was looking around and was seeing more and more soldiers looking at me and the horse as they walked by.

I looked around again and saw Victor walking over to me.

"Hey, what are you doing with that horse?" Victor asked me.

"Um, I picked him to be my horse, why is something wrong?" I asked him.

"Well, yes and no. That horse belonged to a Scout that died, no one has been able to get near it except for one person. So you being able to ride him and have him listen to you is amazing!" Victor was looking at the horse and me.

"Oh, I didn't know, I can put him back and pick again", I went to stand up but, a hand on my shoulder stopped me.

"No, he's your horse now, you can take care of him", I looked behind me and saw Lance and Beck both standing there with their mouths hanging open, looking at Zane.

He looked at them, then me and walked away.

"Wow, I mean that was-"

"Yeah wow indeed, how did you get Zane to give you him? I mean that horse is like his life line-"

"That's the last thing he has of her-" Lance was cut off by Victor elbowing him in the ribs.

"What's going on that I don't know about?" I asked and stood up to face them.

"Well you see, Zane had a girlfriend for awhile and she died from a Titan almost a year ago, the only thing left from her is that horse. Zane has been the only one to care for it, cause the horse won't let anyone else close to him. So for that horse to let you near him, let alone ride him is amazing, and I think Zane is glad that someone can take care of him again" Victor told me.

I looked back at the horse and he was still drinking. I looked at my teammates and saw them with a look of nostalgia on their faces.

"Well, I'm gonna give him a bath and put him away, I think we've done enough riding for one day", I said and walked the horse back to the stalls.

"Have fun" I heard them yell at me.

I got him ready for the bath and I was wondering what they meant by 'have fun', turns out that the horse hates water. Over an hour later I walked in the cafeteria and saw my Squad at out table, they turned to look at me and started laughing. I was drenched from head to toe, my hair looked like a curtain and my clothes stuck to my body. I walked over to the table and sat by Zane.

"Thanks for the warning" I said and looked at all of them then lastly Zane.

He had a tiny smirk on his face as he was eating the food.

"Glad you found this funny" I said to Zane, he looked at me and ran his eyes over my wet form and smiled and took another bite of his bread.

"Zane, your face will crack" Beck said and Zane dropped the smile he had and continued eating.

"You guys suck" I sat and put my head on the table top.

"Hat bad huh?" Lance said.

"Oh, you know it was bad, I don't even want to hear it", I told him as I was watching the water puddle under me grow on the floor.

"Well, at least you found a horse. Tomorrow you guys can take the day off, have fun, relax on your last day before the expedition" Victor said and stood up with his empty tray.

"You hungry?" I looked up and saw Lance looking at me.

"Yeah, I'm just sore from the bath to get food" I said and put my hand on my chin.

"I'll be back" he said and walked to the food window to get food then he brought it back and sat it on the table in front of me.

"For you" he said and push it a bit with his fingers.

"Thanks, you didn't have to, I would have gotten it eventually" I told him and picked up the fork.

"It's all good, you look bad anyways, and I feel kinda bad for not telling you about Champ and hating water" He said and rubbed the back of his head.

"Yeah you should, you all should" I said a shoved food in my mouth.

One by one the squad was leaving for their rooms. I just took the last bite of bread and handed the cleaning lady my tray, I spun around and stopped, I came face to face with Petra. Kind of creepy when there is no one there, then when you turn around someone just pops out of nowhere.

"Um, yes?" I asked feeling a bit awkward.

"I wanted to say sorry about yesterday and sorry for talking about your scar. I didn't mean to offend you, it's just that I get overly curious about certain things and have to find out the answer". She said, the look she had on her face was telling me that she was sorry for what she did.

"Don't worry about it. Just know that Titans aren't the only enemy to Humans. We are all our own worst enemy after all. Humans", I said and saw shock and hurt spread across her face like a wild fire.

I walked around her and left her standing there. I walked past Captain Levi's table and saw him look at me after looking at Petra, he was giving me a murderess look, probably for how I left her there, shaking and tear filled eyes. Well, somethings are better left for you to not know, hopefully she won't let her curiosity get to her again, but knowing her, she probably will.

I went to my room to gather a change of clothes and things for a shower, even though I was already somewhat clean from washing Champion, I smelled of horse and that was something I didn't want to smell like.

I was stripped and standing in the shower stall washing my hair when a heard a door open and close, one of the other female soldiers must be showering too. I rinsed my hair and turned around to shut off the water, when I turned back around to grab my towel and dry my front I was looking dead in the eyes of Captain Levi.

"Ah!" What the hell?! I quickly held the town over my front.

"What the hell are you doing in here, it's Females only?" I demanded.

He was just looking at me with disinterested eyes, but the look was a bit cold on his face.

"Petra apologized, so why did you leave her crying?" he took a step closer to me.

"I just told her the truth", I said, not letting my gaze quiver from his.

"And what was that?", he took another step.

"That Titans are not the only enemy to Humans, that Humans are our enemy's too", Something flashed through the Captains eyes, but it was gone when I tried to see it again.

"That's it?" His gaze wasn't letting up.

"Why, don't believe that it was that easy to make someone as soft hearted as her cry with that simple answer?" I took a step towards Levi and we were mere inches apart.

"Don't get cocky brat", he said and turned around to walk away.

"Petra doesn't like to know that Humans, can be just as cruel as Titans", he turned his head to look at me.

"Humans are worse, Titan just want to kill, Humans they want to see your pain and agony, they want to see suffering and you breaking. Titans just kill" I told him.

We were staring at each other for a few seconds, before he nodded his head and walked out the door, leaving me alone in the showers. I quickly dried off and got dressed, I didn't want any more unexpected encounters tonight. I picked up all my stuff and made my way to my room, a relaxing time looking at the stars through my window was sounding nice right now.

I opened my bedroom door and walked in, shutting it behind me with my foot and I sat all my stuff down by the door, I'll put it away later, I was too tired to deal with anything else besides looking at the stars. I walked over to my bed and just fell on it, I pulled the covers from underneath me and covered up, getting nice and comfy. The stars were bright and the moon was lighting the sky like a light bulb, a nice sight to see before nightmares took it over.


	6. Chapter 6

The next day went by in a flash. I woke up from a mini nightmare and got ready for the day off. I ate breakfast with everyone like normal and I went outside to practice with Champion again, I wanted to make sure we were good and ready as a team before we went on our first mission together.

We trained for a few hours then rested, trained a bit more then I put him away and gave him a carrot. It was only roughly three o'clock when I found myself having nothing to do. I walked around HQ and the grounds and I couldn't find anything to do.

"Jan you ok?" I saw Victor walk up to me from down the hall.

"Yeah, fine, just board. I was thinking of going to read something, relax before tomorrow", I told him and he nodded his head with a small smile.

"It'll be ok, tomorrow that is, we'll all be looking out for each other, that includes you too" he told me.

"Don't look out for me, I don't need it, nor want it" I stepped around him and walked away.

"Rather you like it or not, my squad may be all rejects, but you're my rejects!" he yelled to me as I turned the corner.

"Squad Leader Victor, why are you yelling, gotta take a shit or something?" I heard Captain Levi snap at him.

I was standing in the library looking over rows and rows of books. Walking back and forth, tracing my fingers over the spines. Nothing was really catching my eye, everything I was seeing was typical, Survey Scout stuff. How to use 3DMG. Strategy 101. Sword techniques and how to apply them in battle. Was there not anything like the book I read last time?

"Hmph" I blew air out of my mouth and walked to the other wall, Let's start from the bottom this time. I crouched down and started readying the book titles on this wall. More of the same categories as the other wall. I was already on the fourth shelve when I was about to give up.

"What are you doing brat" I turned around and saw Captain Levi staring at my with a board look.

"Trying to find a book to read, Sir" I said and watched him.

His face didn't change, if his eyes didn't blink I would have sworn he was a statue.

'Tch, that's it, you've been walking back and forth in this room trying to find some crapy book?" he looked even more unpleased if that was even possible.

"Yes Sir" Was he just going to stand there and state the obvious?

"What are you looking for?" My eyes widened a bit.

"What?" His eye lids dropped a bit.

"I said, 'what. book. are. you. looking. for.'" I blinked a few times.

"Something fake and nothing to do with our world. I live here so I don't want to read about it" I said.

His eye brow raised ever so slightly then dropped. He walked over to me and reached up by my head and his hand was just a few inches from my ear. We never broke eye contact the whole time. His eyes were still the same gray as I remember from out previous meetings. His hair was still in prim cut order and his uniform had no wrinkle in site. His face was smooth with no scare or blemish in site. He smelled pleasant, like musk, grass and tea. This man was a walking high class killer.

I heard him 'hmph' and saw the corner of his lip lift up and saw that he was trying not to smirk. I was pulled back to the situation at hand and saw his arm retract from the side of my head and he had a book held in is hand.

"If you're done staring Cadet, why don't you try reading this?" I looked at the book in his hand and grabbed it from him.

I looked back at his eyes and saw that they were back to their old light of looking board.

"Thank you, Sir" I went to step around him.

"Cut the Sir crap, it's Captain you brat" and he walked away from me and out of the room.

I was still standing in the same spot trying to sort out in my head what just happened. I looked at the book in my hand and read the title.

'Guardians Protected'

I looked back to the door and back at the book, might as well give it a shot. I walked over to the couch in the corner of the room and made myself comfy. I opened the book and read the first page.

In memory of those without a Guardian.

Faith in fear is the only religion that everyone believes in.

Keeps you alive. Keeps you alert. Keeps you safe.

Have Faith

even if it is in fear.

-T. .

I wonder how the writer came up with that? I flipped the page and the first chapter started. Well, lets see if Captain Levi gave me a good book to read.

Chapter 1: Assignment.

"Your still sleeping?" I rolled over and covered my face with a pillow, "Come on, get up. We're getting a signed today, remember?" I guess she thought that I couldn't hear her, so she walked over to my bed and with more force then I thought her to have, and shoved me off my bed.

I hit the floor with a thud. "I heard you just fine with the pillow over my head Frieza." I stated to her. Frieza is my best friend, and she makes sure that I'm not late for thing's. She's at least 6'2 or so, with brown wavy hair that goes just below her shoulder blades, light skinned, poise and above all, beautiful. "Come on, get up, get dressed, We're going to be late." Hearing the news got my attention. "What time is it?" I asked her, "We have ten minutes, so hurry up Desesoray." Was what she replied with.

I was on my feet, in my closet throwing off my night clothes. I slipped on a pare of black pants, followed by a black tank top with disconnected black long sleeves that were held to the tank top by an inch of black fabric that clings to the body and stuck my feet into two inch heeled black boots that go up to the calf. Dashing to my washroom to try and get done faster, brushed my tangled up long blonde hair and teeth.

I, looking some what presentable, winked my blue topaz eye in the mirror at myself. "Okay, I'm ready, let's go." I said, to Frieza as I walked out of the washroom. "It's about time." She snapped at me. She was outside my door, holding it open with her arm.

It wasn't till now that I could see what she was wearing, she was wearing what I was wearing, except it was all white. "Why are you wearing all white?" I had to find out why, "'Cause I look good in white" She said, and put a little smile on her face. We started walking down the hallway that will take us to the main hall.

This morning seemed brighter then the others, it almost hurt the eyes, seeing as how the hall we are walking down was pearl white marble with gold trim around the edges. Finally arriving at the main hall, I could tell that we were the only ones late.

We walked up to the end of the line that the rest of the Guardians have made. Not being there any longer then what seemed like twenty seconds, my name was called, "Desesoray, please fallow me" said a male voice. Looking up to get a better look at who was talking to me, It's Liam. He's 6'9, has long straight blonde hair like me, built and is handsome beyond compare. Stepping out of the line I was in, made my way to where Liam was holding a door open for me to enter through.

Walking inside the office like room, I sat down at the closest seat, which just so happens to be the one right in front of his desk. Hearing foot steps I could tell that he was walking up my right side, he ended up sitting on the very edge of his desk. "I have something for you" He stated, before leaning backwards to reach a piece of paper on the other side of his desk.

After being able to reach the paper, he straightened himself back up and read what was on the paper to me, "Desesoray, you are now the Guardian of one Domenique Zane", He lowered the paper from in front of his face to look at me. Here I was, all excited to find out who I would be Guarding, then to get hit in the face with the truth of which we call reality.

I couldn't take it anymore, the silence was eating at my skin. "What?! Are you kidding me? Why do I get paired with him? He's always getting into trouble and for some odd reason that I don't know why, the Humans are always wanting to kill him!"

My voice started out normal and in control, but somewhere along the lines, the control slipped. Again with the silence. Liam didn't speak when I was done talking, I guess he was waiting to see if I had anything more to say, (which I didn't). Finally after being able to hear the wings of a small bug, Liam spoke.

"Desesoray..." He sets down the paper on the desk, "...Every Human you have Guarded is dead. It's not that you didn't keep them safe 'cause you did, It's not your fault that you couldn't kill the human that want's to kill your human", He tolled me. "I know that. But why him Liam? Of all the humans, why him?"

I was giving up, but I was being stubborn about it. "I don't know Ray, just 'cause I guess", Was all he replied to me. Sensing that this was all I was going to get out of Liam, I asked him the question that I was dreading on asking. "Where is he?" Liam looked back at the sheet of paper that he held not to long ago, "He's in Florida". Taking a deep breath then releasing it, stood up, pushed back the chair and walking up to and out the door.

Back out in the main hall, there were barely any Guardians left, I walked past all of them and didn't stop walking till I got to the balcony that over looks the city's land scape. Not many moments have past when Frieza showed up, just like I thought she would. "Ray what's wrong?" She asked walking up beside me while calling my nick name that I let her keep.

"Out of all the Humans on Earth, guess who I'm signed to Guard?" I asked her but not looking at her. I was still calming down what last little bit that I needed to. "Um, I don't know ray?" Gathering my thoughts on the matter only kept me upset, but I told her anyway's. "Domenique Zane, that's who I'm Guarding" After telling her, I pushed off of the stone rail that I was leaning forward on, to get a better look at what her reaction was, and may I say, I was not expecting what she had to say.

"Well, I can sorta see why, can't you?" She looked at me after finishing her sentence, "No I can't. I asked Liam but he said he didn't know" Crossing my arms I leaned up against the railing again. "Look at it this way, you've killed so many Guardians keeping your Humans alive. At least with Domenique you don't have to worry about him dying"

She was making a point, after all, Domenique is the type of guy that doesn't go down without a fight. But still to be having to protect this guy will be a full time job, that I'm not even getting paid for. "I don't want to be in 'on' mode all the time, I do like to be in 'off' mode every now and then Frieza" I told the brown haired Guardian in front of me. I may be good at what I do, but that doesn't mean that I enjoy doing it. Yes killing is easy to me after years of practice, but that doesn't mean that I like to take a life.

"If someone kills you, then girl they deserve a medal, a nice shiny gold one. Look I know that you don't want to guard him, but he's your Human now and you can't just let him die. Well you can, but knowing you, hell would freeze first" She gave me one of her smiles that manly meant that everything was going to be 'okay'.

She was right after all, I wouldn't let one of my Humans die, not without a fight. "Fine, you're right I'll do my best". I wasn't ready to leave just yet, but Domenique is on Earth with no one Guarding him. "Well Frieza, it's been fun, but I got to go find my Human, call on me some time Fray" I told her.

"Alright girl, I will, have fun now and don't kill him" She said, while trying not to laugh at the last words that past threw her mouth. After shacking my head at her, I stood up on top of the railing, spread my wings and took off, souring my way toward's the portal that is held up high in our sky's, to none other than, the third planet known as Earth.

"Hey Janice, didn't think I'd see you in here, found a book to read?"

I looked over the book and looked at Victor, "Obviously" I said and went to go back reading.

"Cool, what book is it?" he walked over to the couch and sat down.

"It's called Guardians Protect" I showed him the cover.

"Never heard of it" he said and stood up from the couch.

"Well, I'll let you read, just came to say dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes" he said and walked out the room.

Strange. I wonder if he's still feeling awkward after what happen earlier? Oh well. I sat up and closed the book. I'll read more later, and deciding to keep the book and take it to my room. Dinner, here I come.

* * *

~Author note~

The book 'Guardians Protect' is not a real book, but it is a story I have been working on, so it is mine. (work in progress. what you read was the rough draft) the story won't become apart of CAGED. I just needed a book for her to read and that was the best I had at the moment. If you are curious about the book PM me and I'll fill you in.

Also the Author T. . Is not a real Author. That is a mix of my name with letters missing and rearranged.

Thank you for reading this story, even if I don't post as much as I should, but I will keep updating till I am done telling Janice's story.

Happy readings~


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